Updated:
Why fear should have your ears, not your balls you ask? I will do my best to explain why. With the recent events that have happened not just in western countries like Brussels and Paris but also in far-flung third world countries such as Ivory Coast, Kenya and Istanbul.
It would be impossible to say that fear is not at the forefront of every traveler’s thoughts. We are only human. To us and hopefully to you, life is still a precious thing. The same thing can not be said for the cowardly terrorists that are sprouting up like weeds all over the world.
[the_ad id=”13767″]
Why fear should have your ears, not your balls :
Fear of traveling:
In the new world, it is important to keep ourselves vigilant. Keep our ears to the ground. We must all do this as a collective. You shouldn’t become paranoid however, just do your part. Stay observant as you travel through places such as airports, train stations and other public areas.
Terrorists are looking for the maximum damage and loss they can inflict on the world. It would of course make sense for them to target public areas. I am guilty of not observing my surrounding when l travel, being so involved in my own little bubble.
We (all of us!) have almost become immune to the overhead announcements that tell you not to leave your bags unattended or to report any suspicious packages. It is about time we start listening again.
You never know whose lives you might save. Listen to your iPod, talk on the phone or what not, but still keep an eye out for things out of whack. It seems the security personnel pay so much attention to foiling our innocent attempts to bring our water that they fail to notice the freaking guns/kids/bombs right under their noses! 😉 🙂 . Learn to trust your gut instinct.
[the_ad id=”13784″]
Fear and your eyes:
Don’t prejudge people. Every person you see wearing a hijab is not a terrorist. They do not want to blow you up or cause mayhem. They want to catch their train, bus, plane….just like you and go home to their loved ones.
I have noticed something in common with all these terrorists that l see captured. They all seem to be young men and women from middle class families. I tend to believe that most of their parents truly have no idea that their kids are brainwashed.
I think they believe they are giving their kids structure, discipline and guidance when they send them off to the mosques. Think of when christian kids attend church. The parents are proud and you consider it a good thing.
Unfortunately, the house of worship seems to be quite the recruitment “offices” of these terror cells. The kids heads get filled with manipulated teachings of the holy Koran. Promises of virgins that will be theirs in the next life being one of them. What wet behind the ears, real life frustrated virgin kid wouldn’t be swayed by that?! Thankfully, they are a tiny percentage of the whole.
[the_ad id=”13783″]
The rest of the Muslim world want peace. I come from Nigeria, and we definitely have had our share, and still have more than our share of terrorism. I will not give them credit by mentioning their names.
You should know that despite what you see on the news, the Christians get along well with the Muslims and most live harmoniously side by side in most parts of the country.
I feel tensions are understandably frayed. Shortly after the Brussels attack, a famous mosque in Madrid was burned in retaliation. We are playing into their hands while our leaders are twiddling their thumbs 🙁 . This is of course my personal opinion, l am not an expert.
[the_ad id=”14098″]
Fear and your nerves: I must not Fear. Fear is the mind killer
Of course you should be nervous about flying or catching the train. You should also be nervous about driving your car to work or wherever. Nervous about taking the bus, heck..nervous about walking or dating a weirdo. Any and all of these things plus a crap load more should make you nervous.
How many times has a date turned out to be someone’s last day on earth where they are bludgeoned to death, or shot? How many times have people gone to the theater to watch a movie, only to be killed by a deranged psychopath?
How many times have parents sent off their kids to school only to have them shot to death? Deaths at the hands of a spouse? How many times have people just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time and paid with their lives?.
I could go on for days about all the horrible things that happen to innocent people each and every single day. It would be irrational to say one doesn’t feel nervous about s**t happening 😉 .
One of my favorite quotes in the world is by Frank Hebert. He wrote the Sci Fi novel Dune. The first time l heard it was on a song. I had always mistakenly attributed the song to one of my favorite techno bands of the nineties Bigod 20, but it was actually another favorite band Eon, the video is attached.
Twenty five years later, it is still a kick ass head banging song that reminds me of underground techno parties in seedy areas along Pico back in those days 🙂 . Feel free to be nervous. It only makes you human.
[the_ad id=”14099″]
Fear and your balls:
No! Thank you! Hold on firmly to those 😉 . Own your fear. Does being nervous or fearful of a bus running you over stop you from going to work every day? Does it stop you from saying hello to strangers? Does it stop you from calling Uber for your next ride? Does being fearful of an earthquake stop you from living in California?
Does being fearful of a tsunami stop you from living in Japan? No! It does not. You should carry on with your life. Living, and living well is the best revenge. We must show the cowards that they can not win.
Travel Anxiety:
Travel anxiety is perfectly normal, especially in light of what is happening in the world, plus the fact that you have to give up some control.
Travel Anxiety Tips:
- Meditate and take deep long breaths to calm your nerves
- Think positively (imagine the wonderful new places you will get to see)
- Get travel insurance before your travels
- Reach out to fellow passengers. Talking can help calm your nerves
- Distract yourself with your favorite music or movies on Spotify or Netflix for example
- Stretch your legs during the flight or journey. Get up and move around
- Plan your next trip in your mind. This is a psychological boost because it means your survive this current one and are ready for the next
We booked our visit to Brussels shortly after the previous foiled attack last year and Paris attack. We have booked trips for the near future. We will not cancel them, we will not let fear win. We will not let them win. You shouldn’t either! Their aim is to eventually engage all Christians against all Muslims. Don’t let them speak for you.
[the_ad id=”14118″]
Travel on without fear:
Do your research on your trips, then travel on. I am not saying to be foolhardy and travel to obvious hotbeds of terror. As much as l would love to see the magnificent beauties in Iran for instance, l wouldn’t travel there.
We loved our holiday in Istanbul, and the people are lovely. Stay in the loop as far as what is happening in the world. The whole world, not just the world that is presented by western media, then make an informed decision.
Life is what you make it. Celebrate it. We plan on doing so by traveling on. Look out world, we’re still coming 🙂 . These are my reasons why fear should have your ears, not your balls. Your balls deserve better! 🙂 .
[the_ad id=”14119″]
Pin it for later:
So many different fears in travel and life:
- Fear of crowds
- Fear of people
- Fear of religion
- Fear of crowds
- Fear of planes
- Fear of different food
- Fear of language
There will always be fear. As the Mark Twain saying goes, “travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, narrow-mindedness”. Discover life outside your bubble. You will learn a lot. Trust me.
You had me until your blanket statement that these terrorists come from middle class families. Check you facts.
I believe l said “I” had noticed something that these people seem to have in common. This is my observation, and l stand by it. Even the masterminds of 9/11 and the people who carried it out were determined to be middle class, highly educated young men. Granted, my news may be more European slanted where it is believed that over 60% of them seem to be from middle class families. Thanks for chiming in 🙂 .
Well said Kem! There was a girl at work the other day who said she got in a huge fight with her mom because her mom still planned on going forward with a trip to Europe even though this stuff has happened. She called her mom “reckless and irresponsible.” I augured for her mom. I said she probably had more of a chance dying on the 405 freeway than getting killed by a terrorist attack. You would dump maybe a couple thousand you put towards the trip, just because you have a 00097% chance of getting blown up? If I was her daughter yeah I might feel nervous, but letting fear hold you back from traveling?? Now if the country were full of current civil unrest or something, maybe not, but these attacks are totally random…or at least if feels that way to me.
So glad you took the mother’s side Tonya! Reckless and irresponsible? Very harsh words indeed. The 405 freeway is enough to kill you..by suicide even :-). Many a times l have dreamed of horrible things while stuck on it! They seem random at best, and to let fear hold you back is truly letting them win. I hope the mom enjoys her trip! That would be the best revenge :-). I can get the daughter being worried…but sheesh..
I hear you Kemkem..there’s no way I will let fear stop my urge to travel..and all the terrorists in the world cannot keep me away from all the Brusselicious food in Brussels; the fries slathered in mayonnaise, the waffles, oysters?
I long to visit Mogadishu again..I am very interested in going to Istanbul, or Lahore..we just have to learn to strengthen our resolve, and not let the terrorists break our spirit..we need as well to be super vigilant wherever we are..
We must soldier on :-). Mmmmm…the waffles. Now you have me salivating. We definitely need to be more vigilant. Going forward, l am going to stop being so self involved in public places, and keep an eye out. We can’t let them break our spirit as you so eloquently put it. I definitely want to go back to Istanbul, visit Kenya and so many other places 🙂 . The food alone..aaahhh…
I think about it, but I can’t stay scared. My kids are watching, and I want them to experience the world unafraid. Awesome post!
Thank you. I loved what you said about your kids watching and wanting them to experience the world without fear. Bam! So well said. Fear spreads and children will pick it up on how you handle it. We can not be constantly scared. We must press on 🙂 .
Awesome post! You should never let fear top you from anything.
It is natural to feel fear, it’s how you handle the fear that counts. True measure of a person. Thanks for the comment.
You are so right. I am guilty of letting fear win sometimes- especially with trying new foods, or maybe going to a concert alone. Sometime the unknown, especially food- should not be feared, I don’t know why. I’m working on it. I usually don’t fear going to other cities or countries. But thank you for this post. I need to share with my Mom!
I think it only makes you normal to have fear. I have also been guilty of letting fear win sometimes. Not for going to concerts alone though..haha! I remember years ago going off to see Paul Simon in Boston all by myself at like 14 or something, and my sisters were furious when l got back home late at night 🙂 . I didn’t tell them knowing they would forbid me. I have a fear of cats that can never be conquered 🙁 . Thanks for sharing the post, hope it makes your mum worry less 😉 .
Fear shouldn’t so you from living the life you want! Be cautious, but be LIVING! Great post, as usual. 🙂
Thanks a lot 🙂 . Be living is right. It is absolutely the best revenge. They can suck it! 😉 .
Very good article, well said! We’re planning to go & live in Budapest for a month in June (yay!) and after hearing about the news, I was starting to be worried thinking about “what ifs”. Fortunately, shortly after, I realized exactly what you said: same chances of something bad happening are when you drive a car, when you wait in line at the grocery store and when you live your daily life as you use to. So what if I leave worries behind and I enjoy life? This way, they don’t win.
Thanks C. Oh boy, am l excited for you right now! That is awesome news. Awesome news. You know how much we love Budapest. I can’t wait to have your new take on it. Coming back and actually staying and getting a feel for costs etc. I’m so glad you ultimately decided to do it. Things can happen no matter where you are, and what you are doing. I think when your number is up, it just is. I was reading more about the victims in Brussels. There was a guy who was at the airport and escaped the blasts. He called his family to let them know he was okay and took the metro back home, and unfortunately, he died in the metro blast. A young missionary guy was in Boston, in Paris and escaped with no injuries. He was also at the airport, and he got schrapnel. Who knows our fate? Nobody does. You just have to keep on living…winning! 🙂
Yeah, we’re pretty excited too! Can’t wait to give this a try and see if we could really handle it for longer amounts of time.
And boy… such a sad story about the “survivors”. It really enrages me to hear about stupid people killing for stupid reasons and I can only hope that in hundreds of years, we’ll be evolved enough not to do this anymore… low chances, though 🙂
Very low chances. We love to hurt ourselves too much unfortunately 🙁 .
Beautifully expressed KemKem! The most frightening thing about terrorism is its random nature which frightens many people into seeking places they feel are “safe” and cede control to a small group. As you say, constant awareness of one’s surroundings is key but I still think traveling to other countries, experiencing new cultures, learning about the history and meeting new people is really the best way to combat terrorism. We learn tolerance and appreciation of those who are different from “us” when we travel! Anita
Thanks for weighing in Anita. You are right, traveling and discovering other cultures goes a long way to combat fear. Those who fail to learn from history are doomed to repeat it. The good people outnumber the bad, and we must not let the tiny cowardly twats win 🙂 . We will keep traveling and discovering. The world has been through worse, and it’s still here.
Lol at the title of this post! 🙂 I totally agree with you. People have been cautioning us against going to Europe or the Middle East. And while it’s important to be cautious, we can’t let fear debilitate us. There’s so much violence that takes place right here in the U.S. each day, so unless a place is a war zone or a terrorist hotbed (i.e., Syria, Yemen, etc.), I’m not going to let these incidents keep me from traveling. Anything can happen anyplace at anytime. I just start my day with prayer and ask for God’s protection and trust that he will be faithful to protect me.
I tried to think of another title, but nothing really conveyed the way l felt.. :-), I did change the title for itunes purposes on the podcast as l am in the “clean” category 🙂 . You’re right about the violence in the U.S, really compared to the rest of the world it sometimes seems like a war zone, but we don’t think of it as such because we are doing it to ourselves..which is just weird thinking. End result is loss of lives and so much sorrow for many 🙁 . Yep..you just hope your higher power is on the lookout for you.
Agreed Kemkem, to a certain point. It won’t stop me from travelling around Europe because in the end you never know where they will strike. But right now I wouldn’t go to a warzone either and that includes Turkey which is at war on 2 fronts. I posted on it last year and people called me stupid, but they’ve had a few bombings in Istanbul in recent months aimed specifically at tourists. In the end its like choosing your stock portfolio, it’s about your perception of risk and how much of it you are willing to risk.
Frank (bbqboy)
I remember the post Frank. I guess l should have been clearer. I meant that l would still love to visit Istanbul in the future. I am aware of the war zone on the second front, and that makes it a place not to visit right now. Every place l have visited is now moved down the list, as l want to experience first places first. The only place l would not mind going back again and again right now is London, l’d rather spend the $ discovering new worlds 🙂 . The last Istanbul attacks are totally aimed at tourists, the Sultanahmet area was sacred, but no more. You always gotta choose your battles 🙂 .
I agree 100%, I can’t let fear keep me from living. I work in Washington, DC there is a constant nervousness about being in the city. Is today the day someone does this or that. Just yesterday someone was at the Capital with a gun. Lock down took place and everything was crazy. It makes me nervous, but I never want to become immune or that is happens so often that I don’t care.
I’m cautious, I’m street smart, but I am going to live. I’ve got to show of these balls.
“I’ve got to show off these balls”.!!! I couldn’t have said it better 🙂 . I can just imagine how tense it is around there. It’s really scary that there are so many guns about. You have to be nervous, and yep..definitely gotta use caution and stay alert. Keep showing those brass balls 🙂
You were right Kemkem, I like this post as much as I like the post that I wrote myself about not living up to the fear! Am I going to let current events dictate how I travel? Certainly not! My steady advice to anyone that asks is to observe your surroundings, be cautious in large crowds, no finger-pointing at random innocent people just because they’re wearing a turban or “strange” clothing, and carry on travelling, if that is what you want to do.
I like my balls and I’m gonna keep ’em! I’m not going to let fear take control! 🙂
p.s. You’re right most of the radicalised young men and women tend to be middle-class, grew up in the West, and although far from poor and ignorant ,were brain-washed and looking for answers in a modern world dog-eat-dog-religious-free world.
Thanks :-). I like my balls too, and l want them intact. No parting with them 😉 . I am no expert, and don’t know about world affairs, but l think they need to find ways to focus the energies of these young men into productive areas. It is unfortunately so easy with the advent of the internet to search out and join all these groups. I fear we may get to the point where Big Brother comes into play to some extent 🙁 .
I agree that people shouldn’t let what goes on in the media deter them from going to the places they want, and doing the things they would like to do. If people let those things dictate their lives they’d never be happy.
You’re right Kim. Letting people dictate your life is a sure recipe for unhappiness. There will always be something. You can’t become so fearful that you end up just existing. That is no good to anyone. A balanced media would be welcome instead of everything being sensationalized for ratings :-(.
This is so true. What an awesome reminder, thanks for sharing! I love the photo of the children playing. So sweet and innocent.
I’m so glad you like the picture. We were on the other side going towards the Tower Bridge. It was actually like 6 photos we took. You see the mum with the her 2 kids coming up the stairs and the girl is watching them. Then the mom is up higher and the 2 girls are playing. The little kid then goes up to the mom probably to ask permission to play, then the next one, she shyly goes to them and they play together..while her mom is talking on the phone like way to the right. Really sweet 🙂 . Innocent and sweet just like you say 🙂
I refuse to live in fear! Travel will resume as normal.
Yeah! Good to know, not that l doubted you for a second. Travel on 🙂
Good article! I think people will use these travel terrorist attacks as another reason why they arent traveling. Some people will live a very scary life that way. America is scary in itself hello…so can’t pinpoint fear just in traveling thats paranoia.
Thank you. People always love a reason for everything. Yeah…fear immobilizes them, and excuses begin. Haha! America is very scary in itself exactly like you say. We just have to MOVE ON! Life is unpredictable, and will always be 🙂 . Thanks for the comment.
Great post and you are absolutely right! If you’re going to be afraid then you might as well be afraid of it all. Bad things can happen afar as well as right next door!
Yep! You might as well be afraid of everything. Bad things can and do happen no matter where you are. Far away and at home..sigh..no one can predict the future “-) . Thanks for the compliment.
I agree. When we stop living at the hands of terrorist they win. I think of that song Ironic. You can play it safe and be killed in your neighborhood by a freak accident. We have to set fear to the side and live life.
Yep. That would be playing right into their hands. Misery loves company so to speak, so it is important that their twisted ideology does not win. I like waht you say. Set fear aside and live life. Well said indeed 🙂 .
Great post and a timely reminder that fear in all forms is never beneficial, quite the opposite. The world seems strange but even in the midst of chaos we can find beauty, warmth and humanity.
Thanks Lili. Yes, we can find beauty, warmth and especially humanity during the times of chaos. Like Anita says somewhere down below, continuing to experience other cultures opens the mind and humanizes us. Fear should not hold us back 🙂 .